I'm the Only Totem in Another World - Chapter 68

Chapter 68: Community Literature （2）

[Close-Range Spy: The Rebellious Hero Goja Buro Episode 5

???: “Oh ho ho~ I must touch Pikachu’s belly~ Hong hong~”

Goja Buro: “Kill all living things in this area… that’s the order… Should I take care of that snake-like guy first…”

???: （Flicks Goja Buro’s fingernail away with a glare） “What are you..? Ahㅡ. You’re the servant of the Black Mage who’s been brutally murdering people lately…「Goja Buro」ㅡ?”

Goja Buro: “?! Black Mage..? That can’t be… My master is definitely… the「Cho Wol Ja」who rules the universe…”

???: “Kekeke~ You fool… You’ve forgotten everything because of the Black Magic… Have you even forgotten the memories of「her」…”

Goja Buro （Rampage）: “Don’t lie! Insulting my masterㅡ. is the same as insulting me…「Massacre mode a.wa.ke.ning. ㅡ.”

???: ‘… He’s slaughtered too many humans… He’s already crossed the line of causality…’

???: ‘But if I restore his memories, maybe he’ll eliminate the Black Mage he calls master…「Black Magic Removal Technique No. 3」ㅡ. 「Shining Road」ㅡ.’

Goja Buro: “?!?!?! Kyaaak!!! These memories?!?!?! Kyaaak!…”

“Aah… So that’s how it was…「Master」… No, 「Darkness Darkyami」… I will kill you with my own hands…” ]

There’s no twist.

It really was Goja Buro Episode 5.

He uploaded it so confidently, I had some hope for something like ‘Informative post that I thought was Goja Buro’.

Does this bastard not know what double baiting is?

…I’m pissed, should I leave a hateful comment?

Suddenly, a ‘good idea’ flashed through my mind.

Wouldn’t it be okay to ask him about the Hidden Piece that might be in the Imperial Arena?

He might know, considering he has an unrivaled amount of information among the community users.

I saw a post like this on the community a few days ago.

[Ruroreb: That Close-Range Spy guy

Isn’t he the one who used to be ranked 1st in the Paladin Survival world rankings like it was nothing?

His nickname reminds me. He was a popular user in the Seongsal Gallery too.

I think he’s the same guy who used to brag about being a Level 999 Paladin and give advice all the time.]

– Comments –

[Bbamko: Ah, that’s right lol He was banned from Inven for posting too many bragging posts lol]

[Close-Range Spy: Delete this, you brat]

If he was ranked 1st in the world, wouldn’t he know almost all the information?

After much deliberation, I decided to send a private message to Close-Range Spy.

I’ll have to meet him someday anyway to go to the Capital and stop the dimensional gate.

It wouldn’t hurt to build a rapport with him now.

[Hey Close-Range Spy]

Even after waiting for over 30 minutes, there was no reply.

…It’s not like there’s no other way.

[I saw Goja Buro Episode 5 lol It was so funny lol]

Now I’m scared of how used to lying I’ve become.

Geunchop. Do I have to go this far?

[Close-Range Spy: Are you…one of the Legendary 3 Knights?]

He takes the bait immediately.

He does remember me.

Come to think of it, he commented on the ‘Barbarian Girl’ post I briefly uploaded, saying he enjoyed it, and when I defeated Karon last time, he called me ‘one of the Legendary 3 Knights’ and showed favor.

He must think I’m a righteous and good Paladin.

[I have a question for the Level 999 Paladin]

[Close-Range Spy: I see…I’ll allow one question, especially for you. Ask away]

I really want to beat him up.

[Do you know what the Hidden Piece in the Imperial Arena is and where it is?]

[I’m near there lol]

[Close-Range Spy: Ah, you mean ‘that’?]

[Close-Range Spy: It’s…]

I got information about the Hidden Piece from him.

This is good.

[Thanks for the info]

[Close-Range Spy: Continue to work with the other two knights to create a clean community]

[Ok]

[Close-Range Spy: You’re speaking casually to your senior]

[Ouuu]

There’s a limit to how much I can take. Thanks anyway.

I closed the message window.

“Yaaat! Hwaat!”

“A warrior should be able to block this easily! Take this! Starburst Stream!”

Noah is getting diligently attacked by Dodo.

“I, I’m getting the hang of it now. One more time…”

“No, it’s over. If you act cocky towards me one more time in front of Malak-nim, I’ll kill you.”

“Damn it!”

Kanto couldn’t even touch Rake’s fingertip in the end.

I have nothing to do either.

…Should I upload a novel too?

The only posts I’ve uploaded are the Barbarian series. I’m a little worried I might be suspected.

What if I write a cool prologue and upload it? Everyone would change their perception of me.

This is the point where my title is changing from ‘Barbarian Enthusiast’ to ‘one of the Legendary 3 Knights’.

Even Noah, who can be considered the biggest risk factor right now, is good at keeping her mouth shut.

Unlike her foolish actions and appearance, she seems to be the type to keep secrets.

…Come to think of it, Noah has never talked about herself.

She hasn’t mentioned anything about Earth, the game, or possession in front of the inhabitants of this world.

I get the feeling she’s the type who thinks a lot but doesn’t act on it.

Good. Let’s upload a novel.

I’ll make sure they don’t even suspect I’m a Loa.

It’s definitely not because my creative spirit is boiling over.

…What should I write about?

First of all, a traditional fantasy is definitely out of the question.

It’s easy to end up like ‘Knight of Steel’, the first community literature that was uploaded.

The community users are Earthlings who have been possessed in a fantasy world.

And not just any fantasy world, but a demon apocalypse fantasy world.

These people wouldn’t want to read a sweaty, traditional fantasy novel.

While pondering what subject to write about, I slowly scrolled down and found a novel written by Siu.

She followed the trend too.

The title is a bit peculiar. Should I take a look?

[Morning Tent Erection Knight: I Became a Sex Parrot Episode 1

Bags of snacks piled up in the corner, leftover chicken from yesterday. And tissues rolling around on the floor.

I was looking for a new novel in this perfect paradise.

“Ha, there’s nothing to see. Isn’t there a novel that smells fresh and like a masterpiece?”

All the novels these days are trash, you know?

Whenever I have free time, it’s all regression, obsession and ruin, academy, villainess, overpowered protagonist, etc. Just a pile of trash with the same content and no originality whatsoever.

Even the works that are considered original have the same characters when you look closely.

The blonde, blue-eyed, proud princess.

The white-haired saintess who’s always obsessed with ruin.

The red-haired, hot-tempered mage with twin tails.

The black-haired, gloomy, friendless girl with big breasts and borderline personality disorder.

“I just want to read a novel with a fresh and innocent taste!”

The bed springs creak and groan, signaling for death.

I ignored it.

“Ha…I just want to devour a novel like sex.”

It was the same when I looked for new works. All familiar tastes.

The one I disliked the most was the novel at the top.

“Why is this mass-produced work ranked 1st in new releases?”

A typical academy regression novel with obsession and ruin.

“It’s because works like this are ranked 1st that original novels can’t rise to the top!”

I need to show them the bitter taste of fear.

“You’ve met your match. I sentence you to 5,700 characters of sex spamming! Let’s go~!”

I posted dozens of comments filled with only the word ‘sex’.

“Phew, I can sleep soundly tonight! Who am I? The guardian of conscience! The cheerful and witty reader!”

I lay down on the bed with a sense of accomplishment and tried to sleep.

I couldn’t fall asleep, so I checked my phone and saw a few text messages.

The moment I checked them, I was possessed in that novel.

“Sex…”

Fucking sex.

（You have been possessed in another world. The reason you were possessed is not because you criticized the novel, nor because you read a 1,000-chapter novel with 1,000 views per chapter.）

（To leave after writing 5,700 characters of just ‘sex’! You hit-and-run bastard! I’m cursing you, the epitome of a vulgar hit-and-run bastard!）

（The curse of the sex parrot who can only say one word~! Good luck!）

After receiving a one-sided notice of being dispatched to another world from a god, crazy bitch, or Korean woman, I decided to assess the situation first.]

━…

This is dizzying. Is this Siu’s autobiographical novel?

The writing was a mess to the point where using words like ‘hit-and-run bastard’ and ‘Korean woman’ openly felt like a minor issue.

It’s a fantasy possession story similar to our situation, so it might resonate, but the genre is the problem.

Comedy is one of the most difficult genres to handle.

This ‘sex parrot’ subject matter is the same. The main character can only say ‘sex’, so how is the story going to progress?

Can Siu, who’s clearly a novice, handle this well?

Honestly, I don’t think so. At best, she’ll write 30-50 chapters and then stop updating or say she’s going to remake it and run away.

I skimmed through a few more works.

Well, they were all pretty much the same. The writing was bad, but the choice of subject matter was the worst.

Still, I guess it’s fortunate that I could learn from their mistakes.

At least I’m going to set my story in the modern world.

The users are all from modern Earth, and they all dream of going back.

They would want to read a novel that smells like 21st century Earth.

Then…